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Posts Tagged ‘marriage’

Directions not included…

In Uncategorized on October 18, 2013 at 2:03 pm

16

18 October 1997.

5:00 in the evening.

I willingly…  happily… and eagerly became his wife.

That day is forever branded into memory.  To call it bliss, doesn’t even give the day its proper description.  It was simply what it should have been… absolutely perfect.

Fast forward.

16 years later.

18 October 2013.

Looks as if a celebration is in order, eh?  As Tony, Toni, Tone would croon, “It’s our Anniversary”!

In the context of this blog post, and the typed words on a computer screen, those dates sit so close together… making a span of 16 years appear extremely compressed.

Yes…  truly, time does fly!

However, with certainty, I can assure you that a 16 year span of marriage is far from compact.  Also… with ABSOLUTE confidence I know that such unions are a steady and beautiful work in progress.  Haha… and once you enter into such relationship, directions on how to make it work, are not included!

Keeping it real…

Since I have been his wife, there have been moments in which I have failed miserably.  Serious talk here… try as I might, there have been times where the connection is off.  Something (whatever that something may be) gets in the way… work, school, kids, bills, friends, family, outside interests, comparing “your marriage” to another’s… it just gets in the way.

These are the moments that you don’t talk about, eh?  Well, speaking strictly from my experience, these are the moments that definitely need and deserve breath — especially if you want your union to continue.

On another note, since I have been his wife  — and certainly more often than failing miserably — there are those moments in which I surpass the expectation.

Moments where I… WE… excel as husband and wife.   Moments where the energy and the rhythm is effortless.  Moments where I couldn’t imagine life without that connection.

Fulfilling and radiant moments that I know are our sustaining moments… and the conduit that has afforded a 16th year.

Life is good… and I am feeling the love.

I have been blessed with a man who complements my complex and outspoken being.  Haha — those close in my circle would probably insert a plethora of descriptive adjectives!  They would also say that he too has been blessed with a woman who provides the same to him.   We are a good fit… and somehow, despite the occasional challenge(s) within our union, we just keep going, and going and going…

And for that, I am incredibly thankful and fortunate.

Surely, my story isn’t unique.  Marriage is work.  And sometimes, it may take a second… or third marriage to get it right.  Right?

Who knows what the true directions are…

Perhaps the ideal directions are just a quick list of complied learnings.

Such as:

Marriage is an evolution.

Everything changes — and change is good.

EMBRACE the change.

Go with the flow.

Speak your mind.

Listen to the truth… even when the truth hurts.

Respect each other.

Love each other.

Protect each other.

Laugh together OFTEN!

Don’t take everything so seriously.

Be patient.

And, because it deserves reiteration…

LOVE EACH OTHER!

Yes sir!  The Mr. and I are in in to win it… and we are taking this thang one day at at time!

Raise your glass with me…

Cheers to my 16th year!

-k

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